Greece recorded the highest government debt to GDP ratio in the European
Union, at 176.2 pct of GDP in the first quarter of 2017

The Young Pope, robed in white with a cigarette smoldering between his fingers, leaned toward the cameras.

The Young Pope: “Greece has suffered enough from technocrats, bankers, and the hollow promises of Brussels. The people do not need another grey bureaucrat, they need a voice—alive, charismatic, capable of speaking to both youth and tradition. Therefore, I, the Vicar of Christ, endorse George Stroumboulopoulos as the next president of Greece.”

The cardinals shifted uneasily, whispering among themselves.

The Young Pope (continuing): “Yes, that George. The man with the leather jacket, the man who asks real questions. He is Canadian-born, but Greece is not just a nation—it is an idea, a cradle of democracy, and it deserves a leader who can captivate the world stage. He will not bore you with austerity spreadsheets—he will host a dialogue with the soul of Europe itself.”

Outside, Greek youth erupted in laughter, confusion, and applause. Some held up signs: “Strombo for President!” Others muttered, “Does he even speak Greek?”

The Pope flicked his ash into a golden chalice.

The Young Pope: “Besides, who else can rock a late-night chair and an Orthodox throne with equal dignity? My papal vote is cast.”