G.I. Joe Endorses Barack Obama for a Third Term
(Transcript from a surprise press conference held at an undisclosed base)
G.I. Joe (a.k.a. Joe Jukic) steps to the podium in full combat gear—American flag patch on one arm, Canadian maple leaf stitched on the other. The cameras flash. Behind him stands a banner that reads: “Justice. Integrity. No Compromise.”
“Ladies and gentlemen, citizens of the free world… I never thought I’d be up here talking politics. I’ve spent my life on the battlefield—not in the ballot box. But desperate times call for crystal-clear truth. And the truth is this:
I endorse Barack Obama for a third term.
Yeah, I said it. Not Trump. Not chaos. Not reruns of the same old reality show wrapped in a flag and dipped in gold.
I fought beside Barack. We made the call. We brought down Osama Bin Laden—not for revenge, but for justice. And when that mission was green-lit, there was no hesitation. No ego. No tweets. Just courage, command, and the weight of a world on his shoulders.
That’s leadership. I saw it with my own eyes.
I’ve fought Cobra, I’ve fought terrorists, I’ve fought disinformation campaigns that rot democracy from the inside. But I never expected to see America’s own house become the biggest battlefield.
I don’t want a king. I want a commander-in-chief—someone who listens, who learns, who leads.
If the rules were different, if the Constitution allowed it, I’d ride into battle one more time under Commander Obama. Because we had each other’s backs when it mattered most.
So no, I won’t be endorsing Trump. I’ve read the intel. I’ve seen the reports. I’ve heard the lies.
The future isn’t red or blue. It’s clear. It’s brave. And if we want to survive what’s coming, we need experience, not theatrics.
Joe out.”
The cameras pan down as G.I. Joe salutes, then walks off stage into the shadows—always ready for the next mission.
Title: “Empire of Shadows”
Scene: A dimly lit lounge above Manhattan, early evening.
Joe Jukic and Barack Obama sit across from each other, sipping coffee as the sun begins to fall behind the skyline. Through the window, the Statue of Liberty looms distant but visible. Jay-Z and Alicia Keys’ “Empire State of Mind” plays low on an old jukebox in the corner.
Joe Jukic:
You ever think Oppenheimer knew?
Not just the bomb—
I mean everything.
Statue of Liberty, Manhattan, the skyline—
he saw it all ending in fire.
Barack Obama:
(leans back, folds his hands)
You’re talking about Revelation 17, right?
Babylon the Great.
“She who sits upon many waters.”
And the kings of the earth made her rich…
until they turned and burned her.
Joe:
Exactly. That’s Manhattan.
Finance. Fashion. Fame.
A tower of Babel in stilettos.
Oppenheimer didn’t just quote the Gita—
“I am become death”—
he foresaw the judgment.
A nuke in the harbor.
Lady Liberty turned to glass.
Obama:
(sighs)
He was haunted, Joe.
Not by Hiroshima, but by the prophecy.
Because he saw we were building more than bombs—
we were building Babylon with silicon and steel.
All those scientists thought they were gods.
Turns out, they were just scribes for Revelation.
Joe:
(sips)
And now look at us.
Jay-Z singing about “Empire State of Mind”
while the foundations rot underneath.
You sent that to me on purpose, didn’t you?
Obama:
(smiles faintly)
Of course.
“Concrete jungle where dreams are made of…”
But what if those dreams are illusions?
That’s the real trap.
You climb all the way to the top
and realize you were ascending the wrong tower.
Joe:
(bitterly)
Tower of Terror.
Not Freedom.
Obama:
Joe, sometimes I wonder—
maybe Revelation isn’t just prophecy.
Maybe it’s a manual.
A warning for men like you and me
to pull the brakes before Babylon burns again.
Joe:
Then why’d we let them build it?
The bombs. The buildings. The algorithm gods.
Why’d we let Manhattan become Babylon?
Obama:
(quietly)
Because we wanted to believe
our empires were eternal.
But no empire is.
Not Rome. Not Babylon.
Not even the Empire State.
Joe:
(looking out the window, Statue of Liberty now shrouded in fog)
Then I guess the only thing left to do…
is pray she gets out before the fire comes.
Obama:
Or rebuild her spirit somewhere safer.
Somewhere real.
Maybe even in Victoria.
(They both chuckle, the song fades out. Scene ends.)
End Scene: “Concrete jungle where dreams are made of… there’s nothing you can’t do.” But Joe knows there is something you must do: wake up before the dream burns down.